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00:00:49 --> 00:00:54 Welcome to your Morning Boost, your daily leadership advice to help you lead
00:00:54 --> 00:00:59 your school community, brought to you by AWB Education and sponsored by Grundmeyer
00:00:59 --> 00:01:04 Leader Services, where together we are transforming education, one leader at a time.
00:01:05 --> 00:01:08 Now here's your host, Adam Bush. Good morning, school leaders.
00:01:09 --> 00:01:12 Happy Friday and welcome back to your Morning Boost. I'm thrilled to have you
00:01:12 --> 00:01:15 join me on this insightful Friday of June 6th.
00:01:15 --> 00:01:19 And today we're going to dive into a topic that's crucial for effective leadership
00:01:19 --> 00:01:24 and fostering genuine connections. And this is the art of delivering truth without a sword.
00:01:25 --> 00:01:29 As you know, this week we've been exploring valuable insights from the Fitting 5 newsletter.
00:01:30 --> 00:01:33 One more time, if you're not receiving this fantastic resource,
00:01:33 --> 00:01:38 reach out to us from AWB Education and we will get you hooked up by this awesome
00:01:38 --> 00:01:41 newsletter put out by Grenmeyer Leaders Services every month.
00:01:41 --> 00:01:44 Today we're going to dissect an article from that Fitting 5.
00:01:44 --> 00:01:49 It tackles the often uncomfortable yet incredibly vital act of providing honest feedback.
00:01:49 --> 00:01:53 It's a piece that challenges us to move beyond sugarcoating and silence,
00:01:53 --> 00:01:58 and instead embrace clarity and kindness in our communication.
00:01:58 --> 00:02:01 This perspective is absolutely essential for cultivating growth,
00:02:01 --> 00:02:05 building strong relationships, and truly leading with integrity.
00:02:08 --> 00:02:13 So today we're going to review P.J. Kaposi's article titled Truth Without a
00:02:13 --> 00:02:16 Sword, The Art of Helping Others Grow.
00:02:16 --> 00:02:20 And this article really hit home for me. It emphasizes a critical leadership
00:02:20 --> 00:02:24 skill, that ability to deliver difficult truths with care and intention.
00:02:25 --> 00:02:28 P.J. shares a personal anecdote about receiving honest feedback that,
00:02:28 --> 00:02:31 while direct, ultimately made his work stronger.
00:02:31 --> 00:02:36 It resonates deeply because it highlights how true kindness isn't about avoiding
00:02:36 --> 00:02:38 discomfort. It's about facilitating growth.
00:02:38 --> 00:02:43 His article breaks down why we often shy away from honesty, and it involves
00:02:43 --> 00:02:47 two major traps, sugarcoating for self-preservation and staying silent,
00:02:47 --> 00:02:49 mistaking it for humility.
00:02:49 --> 00:02:54 We often tell ourselves we're being kind, but as his article points out,
00:02:54 --> 00:02:58 it's usually about protecting ourselves from discomfort or potential fallout.
00:02:58 --> 00:03:02 We prioritize our own ease over the other person's growth.
00:03:02 --> 00:03:06 If we're not willing to be truthful, are we truly invested in that person's
00:03:06 --> 00:03:10 development or just in how they make us feel? It's not leadership.
00:03:10 --> 00:03:13 It's self-preservation disguised as kindness.
00:03:13 --> 00:03:18 Similarly, staying silent might feel like humility. I mean, who am I to say something?
00:03:18 --> 00:03:24 But when we have insights that can genuinely help someone, silence isn't humble. It's absence.
00:03:24 --> 00:03:29 It's choosing the safety of not speaking up over the service of contributing to someone's growth.
00:03:29 --> 00:03:34 Real leadership demands more. It requires the courage to lean into discomfort
00:03:34 --> 00:03:37 and speak truth, even when it's easier to stay quiet.
00:03:38 --> 00:03:41 I mean, I've certainly been in situations where I've sugarcoated feedback and
00:03:41 --> 00:03:43 convinced that I was being nice.
00:03:43 --> 00:03:47 But looking back on that now, I realize all I was doing was a disservice to that employee.
00:03:47 --> 00:03:51 I mean, for example, I think about early in my career, I had a team member who's
00:03:51 --> 00:03:52 just struggling with punctuality.
00:03:52 --> 00:03:56 Instead of addressing it directly, I'd make vague comments about the importance
00:03:56 --> 00:04:01 of being on time or send general reminders. It felt less confrontational,
00:04:02 --> 00:04:03 but it certainly didn't solve the problem.
00:04:04 --> 00:04:09 Only when I finally had a direct, kind, and clear conversation did things improve.
00:04:09 --> 00:04:13 And at the time, of course, it was uncomfortable, but it was necessary for their
00:04:13 --> 00:04:14 growth and for the team's effectiveness.
00:04:14 --> 00:04:18 And in the end, it delivered exactly what we needed it to do.
00:04:18 --> 00:04:23 That person was there on time, and that punctuality problem had honestly disappeared.
00:04:23 --> 00:04:25 And this was exactly what we were looking for.
00:04:25 --> 00:04:29 It just took me to step forward and be comfortable with that conversation.
00:04:30 --> 00:04:35 PJ's article champions a powerful concept from Brene Brown. That clear is kind,
00:04:35 --> 00:04:39 unclear is unkind, and those are certainly words that I take to heart every day.
00:04:39 --> 00:04:43 This isn't permission to be harsh, but it's an invitation to be clear,
00:04:43 --> 00:04:48 honest, and kind all at once. When we try to preserve relationships by sharing
00:04:48 --> 00:04:54 half-truths, we're building something fragile that won't withstand pressure or honest conflict.
00:04:54 --> 00:04:57 If we genuinely care about someone's growth, whether it's a colleague,
00:04:57 --> 00:05:01 a student, or a friend, we owe them the truth. We owe them clarity delivered
00:05:01 --> 00:05:05 with care, not judgment or flimsy excuses.
00:05:05 --> 00:05:09 We owe them feedback that makes them better, not just comfortable.
00:05:10 --> 00:05:13 Kindness without clarity, it's a weakness. It feels good in the moment,
00:05:13 --> 00:05:17 but it leaves people stuck. It protects feelings at the expense of growth,
00:05:17 --> 00:05:19 and it builds fragile relationships.
00:05:20 --> 00:05:24 Truth without kindness is cruelty. It stops being about helping,
00:05:24 --> 00:05:29 and it starts being about making a point, which is going to burn trust and close doors.
00:05:29 --> 00:05:34 This real work of leadership, it's about giving people both the truth with enough
00:05:34 --> 00:05:37 courage to be clear and enough care to be heard.
00:05:38 --> 00:05:41 It's about delivering feedback that helps people move forward, not shut down.
00:05:42 --> 00:05:45 It's about choosing long-term growth over short-term comfort.
00:05:49 --> 00:05:53 As we close today and close this week, looking back on PJ's work,
00:05:53 --> 00:05:57 he gives us some amazing advice on how to lead forward truly as leaders.
00:05:58 --> 00:06:02 Don't sugarcoat. Avoid the silence. Although while these are seemingly safe,
00:06:03 --> 00:06:05 ultimately these will hinder growth and build fragile relationships.
00:06:05 --> 00:06:11 True leadership, as his article kindly says to us, lies in the courageous act
00:06:11 --> 00:06:13 of offering both truth and kindness.
00:06:14 --> 00:06:17 Thanks for listening. I hope you've had an awesome Friday, and I hope you have
00:06:17 --> 00:06:18 an even better weekend ahead.
00:06:19 --> 00:06:22 Again, thanks for listening to us. Thanks for joining us on your Morning Boost.
00:06:22 --> 00:06:24 If you have time for a quick rating or review, we would love it.
00:06:24 --> 00:06:26 Any feedback that you got back
00:06:26 --> 00:06:30 to us to help us make this show even more valuable for you is even better.
00:06:30 --> 00:06:33 Thank you for listening. We will talk with you again on Monday.
00:06:33 --> 00:06:37 You have been listening to Your Morning Boost by AWB Education in partnership
00:06:37 --> 00:06:39 with Grundmeyer Leader Services.
00:06:39 --> 00:06:44 You can find out more about our services by clicking on the links in the description.
00:06:45 --> 00:06:49 Remember, you are doing this vital job that only a few can do.
00:06:49 --> 00:06:53 So until next time, thank you for your service to your community.